What to do with VERY frustrated 8 month old?!?!??

[We Three]

Hi Girls...
   My 8 month old dd has had a bit of a personality transplant in the past week. She has gone from being sweet and patient and smiley to this grunting, whiney, arms-flailing little monster!!!! 
   She finally sat up on her own last week (whew!) and now seems SO angry all the time. All I can think of is that she is frustrated because she is ready to be "on the move"...but just isn't able yet. She doesn't even like to be held now, unless she's very sleepy. I actually picked her up from her crib this afternoon (without waking her) just so I could cudddle her! I miss her!!
   We bought a few toys that encourage sitting-up play...this musical mirror thing that sings songs and such....thought she'd love it, but when I sit her up she turns her body, places her hands on the floor and ends up on her tummy, then cries! I put her in a hands-and-knees position, but she collapses after about 20 seconds...more crying. She won't really tolerate her excer-saucer now, (that was my shower-time!ugh!) and no matter what toys I give her to occupy her, she just throws them. Then gets angry and grunts and flails her arms about like a bird! An angry little bird. 
  Each day we practice the crawling, just because I think she'll be happier when she can move around...but I still think she has a ways to go. In the meantime...I am out of ideas!  She all of a sudden cries if I leave the room....but sometimes I just need to leave the room!!!!! I try to talk to her the whole time, but this seems to  her off even more. The only time she seems happy anymore is outside on her swing (which we do several times a day) or at a store...she seems to love the stimulus of the grocery store and the mall. Spent money on a bunch of stuff I didn't even need today just to bring her to Target!!!
  I need to get some thongs done around here, and I don't know if it's wise to run to her every time she cries. My heart tells me to go to her, but I don't want to create a pattern...do I?  I also think that I WANT her to know that I'll come if she needs me, right?
  Holy Cow....this is hard. Where did my sweet baby go???

[momofclaire]

Hello sweet Anne.
Sorry you are having a tough week.    You are spot on with the developmental stuff. She is probably wanting to go go go but her little body just hasn't figured it out yet.  Claire used to thrown things and then be so mad cause she wanted them back but couldn't get them. 
I think you are right to go to her when she is crying.  There are times when you have to pee and she won't be happy but hey a girls gotta go sometimes, right?  I wouldn't worry about those instances but for the most part try to help her through this stage by being close by. 
Could she be teething or in any pain? Is her routine good right now, good naps and night sleep? 
Hang in there. 
Myia

[We Three]

Myia!!
  How are you honey?!??  Thanks for your response....
  Yes, she's great on a very regular schedule with naps (2 a day...late morning and late afternoon) and although I know she is teething, I don't see any eveidence of her being terribly uncomfortable from it. Her top two front teeth have been lingering just below the surface for weeks now...and when her bottom 2 came in (both arrived on the same day!) I just happened to feel them when she was sucking on my chin! They weren't there the day before...and there wasn't even any crying!
  The pee thing?? Good grief...my husband sat her on the bathroom floor last night because she wouldn't let him out of her sight! Today I HAD TO sit and pay a few bills, and I tried doing it with her near me, but she wasn't having any of that. I had to hide...cuz if she knew I was there forget it. Hiding from my baby. Lovely.
  I feel like aliens abducted her and replaced her with an exact replica....but a replica without her sunny disposition. I'm just missing her sweet ways.
  Sleeps through the night from 7 til 7...an angel like that. 
  I am trying to hang in there...we'll be ok...just not very fun right now. I pray it's temporary...cuz this sucks! 
  So nice to hear from you!

[skatty]

Before she could crawl my DD would get very angry and frustrated so the best thing for both of us was to get out of the house. We used to go on long walks in the pushchair, go to a cafe and watch people or I used to put a thick quilt on the grass outside and we would move her toys there, unbelieveably they are so much more interesting outdoors! We even used to do this when the weather was colder, just wrapped up warm. Also if we could meet up with another mother and baby she would forget to be frustrated as she would be interested in the other baby. Around the house I'd often sit her in her high chair and give her some kitchen utensils to play with, it's best to tie them to the chair unless you want to keep picking them up or give her some finger food to snack on, corn on the cob worked a treat, healthy, fun to eat and time consuming!!

If you want to spend money on some new entertainment I greatly recommend a sandpit for the back garden or a small paddling pool filled with plastic balls 

I promise you once she is on the move things will be so much better in regards to her mood but you have a whole load of other challenges instead, I kind of miss the days she would sit in one place lol.

[traceyg24]

My DS is 7 months old and I am experiencing the same problem. It seems to be getting worse every day. If he is not sleeping or eating, he is whining or crying. I try playing with him, I walk around with him, but he doesn't stop. It started with almost constant whining and now it is whining with crying. It is driving me absolutely insane. He used to be a very happy baby who rarely whined or cryed; he would play on his own for up to 1/2 hour with no problems. He is not showing any signs of his teeth coming in. We have given him Ambesol and Orajel in case he's teething, but he has no inflammation or swelling or anything and it doesn't seem to help anyway. This has been going on for a little over a week and I keep thinking it's a phase that will eventually stop, but is showing no signs of getting better or back to his normal happy self and is actually getting worse.

I don't know how much more my nerves can take!

[traceyg24]

Something interesting I have discovered. I thought maybe it was the food that was causing this very frustrating personality change in my DS so I decided to cut him right back to rice cereal again and start introducing foods one by one to see if something in particular was bothering him.

I started by giving him rice cereal for dinner one day. The next day, he barely had a whimper. He had rice cereal for every meal and he was completely back to his normal happy self. It happened instantly. I kept him on rice cereal only for 3 days and he remained my normal happy boy with some few periods of whining/crying (which is to be expected considering he IS a baby!). So yesterday at lunch I decided to start introducing foods again and gave him carrots. He was pretty good the rest of the day, but this morning he has been horrible. Whining and crying almost all morning. Could be an isolated incident and coincidental so I am going to try carrots for lunch again and see what happens.

Food affects people in all different ways including personality changes, especially in children as they don't know how to handle their emotions as adults do.

Food for thought! I will let you know how this progresses.

[EllenS]

Interesting about the foods!  My lo is 8months and  I find that I have to be VERY careful about what foods I'm giving her in combination, because she gets constipated very easily (so cereal only with plums, not with apples, etc...)  and then the constipation makes her cranky.

Fortunately, she has a lot of mobility, but I do find her getting frustrated with things like wanting to take the spoon for herself, then dropping it, then being upset because she wants to eat off the spoon, etc.  She REALLY wants more independence.

When I have to step out of the room, I do not necessarily go to her if she is whining/complaining, but of course if it's a distress cry I hustle.  However, I do acknowledge that I hear her by calling out to her, "yes, ma'am, I hear you, I'll be right back, mommy's going potty" or whatever.  That seems to keep it from escalating.

[traceyg24]

Ok - I thought it was the food thing, but that doesn't seem to have panned out. Nothing has changed. He was good for a couple of days, but I think it was just a coincidence because I can't replicate it.  It has now been 7 weeks to the day of constant whining and crying. I am at the end of my rope. My husband only sees him after work and on the weekends and he is done in from it too. We are having a really hard time enjoying our little bundle of non-joy and it is getting to us. My neighbour told me that I don't look very good and very tired this morning. My nerves are shot. I cry at the drop of a dime and for no reason. I'm a mess. I dread him waking up from his naps and count down until the next naptime or bedtime. I hate going to sleep at night because it brings me that much closer to the next day and having to endure it all over again. And then I feel guilty and like a bad mother for feeling this way. I just don't know what to do anymore.

Has anyone had any success with this issue or had it end somehow? Please show me a light at the end of this tunnel!

[We Three]

Oh Tracy...I'm sorry. Nobody who hasn't been there could ever understand how tough it is sometimes to be a Mom. Does going outside help? I find that dd has a very short fuse if we stay home. Does he have an excersucer or walker...something that would help him be more mobile? Perhaps he, like my dd, is frustrated.

[We Three]

Oh...and how are his poops on the rice cereal? Rice binds my lo up immediately.....just trying to help you troubleshoot!!!

[traceyg24]

He has an exersaucer, jolly jumper, all kinds of toys, but nothing lasts more than 2 minutes without him starting to whine and cry. His poops are good and usually twice a day so he's not constipated. The only time he doesn't whine is when we take him out. So I take him out every day. But I'm starting to notice that he's starting to whine a little bit when he's out too. I'm dreading that it will take over when we are out too. Other people that come over and see him in action cannot understand what is wrong with him. Nobody we know has had the same problem and a lot of people tell us we should take him to the doctor. But what do I say there - my baby whines all day at home, but there is absolutely no other symptoms of anything being wrong and he's fine when we take him out? They will just think we are impatient parents who don't expect babies to whine. I think people think we exaggerate at how much he is whining/crying and that it is pretty constant until they come over and see for themselves.
Has your daughter stopped this insaneness yet? If so, how long did it last?

[We Three]

Well, my first thought is that maybe a trip to the doc is in order, if for no other reason than to just eliminate any possible causes for his upset. Could it be teeth?
 My dd stopped the insanity after about 3 weeks. She is more mobile now, doing the "wounded soldier" belly crawl. She also likes to stand on the couch, with her tummy against the back of it and look out the window. I know it's so hard...as I write this she is being rather patient, sitting at her little musical toy..(fisher-price...has a mirror and sings songs and lights up....she adores it).  I am dreading the fact that I have to dry my hair after this....hopefully she will  "let" me!!!
  I say...go to the docs....stay calm when you talk to them, so as not be written off as an anxious Mom....then if nothing turns up, you'll know that he is perhaps just a kid who is fussy, or easily frustrated, or maybe easily overstimulated. Do you notice any issues with noise or stuff like that? Does anything seem to make it worse or better or it's just a consistent nightmare? Is he a good napper?
  I'm sorry Tracy....wish I could just come over and hang with you...it's so tough sometimes...I still fight the good fight against ppd....so I know I need to stay on top of my emotional state....take care of your baby's Mommy above all else......

[EllenS]

7 weeks of crankiness I think deserves a trip to the dr, sometimes there are things like an ear infection that may not have any more obvious symptoms...I should think if it was just developmental it would have passed already. I would think it's some kind of discomfort.