10.5 month sleep changes. Trying to figure out new easy schedule

[Aking]

Hi I was hoping someone would helps me figure
Out a good new schedule as I'm trying to extend my Los awake time. Until 10 months this is what his easy looked like:
7 awake and bf
8- breakfast
9-1030 nap
11 bf
12 lunch
1-230 nap
3-bf and snack
5- dinner
630- bf and bed until 7am

He was doing amaaaazingly well on this routine. 10 months hit and he has major attachment anxiety. I now can't leave the room but have to sit in the chair in his room until he is asleep.
I'm also pushing his awake time now because I feel he's not quiet tired enough at 9am for first nap so what I'm trying now is :
7 awake and bf
10-1145 nap
1145-bf
1230- lunch
Nap??? Around 230 but sometimes 3 and I always miss on this one
And then I am trying to keep dinner and bedtime the same.
But should I push the bedtime back too? He also seems it by 10. It's been only five days so far so he may need more time? Also I don't know when to stop doing this chair thing while he falls asleep. It eases his fear for sure but I don't want him to forget he is ok to fall asleep without me there too. Any suggestions?

Thanks!
Ak

[Buttonbobs]

I would expect to see a later first nap for a little of this age, so I do think you're right to move it later. We would normally suggest moving later by 15 mins at a time and holding for 3 days before stretching the A time again if needed. I'm not sure if you did this the first time and if not, you may need to hold the new time for a week or more before he gets used to it. It is hard for Los to adjust when they've been used to sleeping at one time, even though they need an increase in Atime, they'll still show tired signs at the old nap time. Persevere though, this is a case of mummy knows best.

Have you seen this average A time thread:

Average A times- BOOKMARK ME!

So many LOs of your DS's age are managing between 3&4 hours A time between naps. I would suggest that you see if you need to adjust naps a bit further until he's going to sleep fairly easily and without lots of time playing in his cot first.

As for bedtime, you may need to move BT later, some Los need a longer day for a while before they begin to cut down one nap a little shorter. I would see how tired your boy seems at his normal Bt, if you think he needs more, push Bt back a bit.

[Aking]

Hi there, his first nap although early, works.
He sleeps a good 1.5 hour nap on average. The second nap
Is my issue and I'm trying to figure out if its because the
First nap is too long or if I'm putting him down too
Early for his second nap. Today for example, he went down for his first nap easily and well at 9:15ish and slept until 10:30. Then I put him down at 1:30 for his second nap and he cried for 20 mins on and off with me in the room and then only slept 30 min. So either he is too late or too early.
He sleeps well at night with a 630 bedtime and wakes at 630-7am.
He was doing two 1.5 hr naps both morning and afternoon until the separation
Anxiety started.
So I'm a bit lost on where to go. I guess I'll just try lengthening the second nap time to later and see if tht helps. Do you think that's a good starting place?

[Buttonbobs]

I would definitely start to stretch the A time before the second nap in that case. Go for 15 mins longer and see what it gets you, hold for a few days and then stretch again if needed.

It's possible he's Ut when you're putting him down but then he gets Ot in the process of fighting the sleep.

I can see you are getting a good nap for that first one, but it is very early for his age so it may still be impacting on his second nap. If you want to keep it where it is, just keep an eye out for EWs as this will be a clear sign you should move it a little later.

In terms of dealing with SA, it's not something I have experience of, but I do think the sleep issue is likely to be routine based at least in part. If the routine were more age appropriate then he may not struggle so much and the SA may not have such an effect. Have a look here for more tips re SA:
Separation Anxiety
Separation Anxiety

[Aking]

Thanks.
Sorry what is EW? Early waking? Yes today I cut his morning nap to 1hr to see if that would make difference as suggested by a sleep consultant I know. I put him down at 920 instead of 9 and this afternoon at 1 which was 3 hours from the morning nap. It took him 30 to settle so perhaps I need 3.5 hr distance from 1-2 naps.
My only issue is I don't really want to put him down too late for his second nap as his bedtime would have to move from 630/7 to more like 745/830 and that's too late ideally.
I know we can't be choosy but he does well with his nights and
It's only the second nap issue. Tomorrow ill try 3.5 hours with 1 hr nap in morning and let u
Know how it goes.
The SA is getting better in the day (not clingy as much or crying as  when his dad leaves for work so I think it's lightening up. Someone told me three weeks for the stage usually. I may try to slowly go back to leaving te room soon instead of sitting in the chair because this aft I did and tried to creep out and the chair cracked and woke him up! Ahh!! Then he was very upset for five mins before settling again.
Thanks for your advice.