Grrr help please :(

[Jodes112]

Hey
You know the day he woke at 7.30am? I definatley would have pushed that nap to 12.30 especially on that day, as he wasnt OT & had slept well the day before also.

I personally think set that nap at between 12.15 to 12.30 dependant on how tired/how long he can last. But i wouldnt shift the time beyond that. Just keep pushing though and keep it at that time. It may be hard the first few days but keep it going it will settle.

[FPT23]

Hi Jody thanks for the response

I didn't have a day in which he woke at 7:30? He woke at 7:15 one morning and I did the 12pm nap that got me 2-2.5hr nap. That happened 2 days in a row w the same WU time.

Yst he did the same WU time, did the same 12:00pm nap and he did it again. Napping about 1hr 15. He also had gone down very easy yst too. He woke up very upset

Today he woke at 6:55am so that's 7am to me haha-- I will try for the 12:15 nap... see if it makes a difference after having a 12hr night.

Any tips with removing myself out of helping him to sleep. Hes officially dependent on my hand. As soon as I remove, he cries. Same w BT.

Xo

[creations]

I agree with what Jody said.

A couple of things to bare in mind.
- OT can come from the nap being too early, although you see the level of tiredness in the morning it is often the tiredness building in the4 afternoon and before BT which can cause a longer term OT from the nap coming early over a period of time. It can be a bit of a viscous cycle with EBT causing earlier WU (due to finishing sleeping) or OT before BT causing EW due to OT (not finished sleeping but can't sleep).
- That waking crying mind nap can be caused by UT. Mine did it when his nap needed moving 10-15 mins later.  He then could transition instead of waking really tried after one cycle.
- the night sleep/length and WU time are more likely to balance out and settle down if you keep the nap and BT at the set times.

hth fx

[FPT23]

Hi thank you creations

What is HTH FX (sorry haha)

I went ahead and did 12:15 pm today. He was actually asleep by 12:10... I expected needing the hand thing and spending time like usual but he crashed.

I've always preferred and have always been more AT with him. I feel that's why we never had issues with nap transitions and rarely had NWs/EWs... if he did it was a sign for me to push. And it always worked

I just feel this jump is scarier from our first experience and I want to handle it better is all haha

Ty and let's see what happens today

[creations]

What is HTH FX (sorry haha)

Hope This Helps
Finger crossed

[FPT23]

Oh ok haha

Well I did the nap... and he slept 1 hr 50mins woke up screaming

But longer than most days

[Jodes112]

Keep it the same for a week or so & see how you get on. It needs time to settle.
How old is he? I know he is 1 but how many months?

For us 1.5hr nap became normal. Anything longer than that was a bonus. Also, my kids would often wake up grumpy. It doesnt neccissarly mean they havent slept wel/had long enough!

Keep at it!

[FPT23]

Thanks.

Well yst he slept almost that 2hr at 12:15 nap.

He also refused BT and was very playful. Pushed it 1 hour. Slept from 7:30/7am today

Uhm tried nap again at 12:15 after a 7am WU... slept 1hr 20 mins woke hysterical as normal

So I don't know anymore what's going on. Zero patterns :-/

[Jodes112]

Let it settle in & keep it set. See how he has got on in a week.

[FPT23]

Will do. Day 3 and it's gotten worse haha but staying optimistic

Any suggestions to remove me out of the equation? I think I've became a prop for sure...

Had 2 NWs which are very rare, he won't sleep without my hand, naps have shortened unless I go in and help at each transition... and he wakes screaming hysterically each time. No matter what.

Feeling a tad desperate

[FPT23]

I truly don't feel it's a matter of him being tired enough yk?

I feel it's SA and I've become a prop

[FPT23]

It's gotten worse- do u think the 12:15 has only gotten him OT?

We had another NW/EW and I move one finger off of him and he would scream. I think I'm officially a prop. How did this happen I used to PD with ease and walk away for MONTHS

He had another wake and he didn't go back to sleep until 2 hours later. That day he had a nap of 1 hr 20 mins and BT was at 6...

He also won't nap without my hand...

I feel I'm making terrible mistakes and it hurts him

[Jodes112]

Ooh no dont beat yourself up! All you have been doing is comforting your child its definatley not something to be mad at yourself for!

Tbh i dont know how to handle the prop situation. It might be an idea to post in props and see if you can get advice there. My advice would be gradual withdrawal, but i wouldnt know where to go next when you say he screams when you lift on finger.

Wrt the NW, could there be anything else that is causing this? Ie, illness, teeth? Or do you think that he is in fact OT? I think you need to follow your gut. If you feel that he is just not able to handle the later nap, pull it back a little. How about trying 11.45 for a while.

EBT was always a winner for us when the kids had just transitioned to one nap. 6pm BT was used often & really helped us for catch up xx

Definatly post in the prop section.

[FPT23]

Ty Jody for your help.

I'm honestly just over the SCREAMS when he wakes up every single day. It's HYSTERICAL.

Why does he do that!?! SA!?! I can't help but feel somewhat responsible

I'm gna try and stick w the 12:15 nap or whatever just to see. I stick w 6pm too and some days he pulls 13hr nights. Not the past few days since I pushed him. Is it set nap regardless of WU time in the mornings? I've been getting 30 min naps too. Doesn't this all sound like OT territory? Giving unusual NWs, and EWs? Despite the late nap he's been EWing in the 4am/5am area. I'm simply exhausted ,

The EW and NWs... noooo nothing that I know of. Nothing out of the "ordinary" he had a tooth come through but not recently any that I can see.


The screaming... I just want that to stop.

How is gradual withdrawal? Each time spend less time w him? He just needs a finger on him and if I lift it, it's over

I don't get it

Creations, any additional thoughts?

[creations]

Ooh no dont beat yourself up! All you have been doing is comforting your child its definatley not something to be mad at yourself for!

Yes, don't be mad at yourself for giving support.

Tbh i dont know how to handle the prop situation. It might be an idea to post in props and see if you can get advice there.

Erm, I don't think we have a props board any longer.

The finger prop - do you have a key phrase?  I think that's what I would do. I'd replace the finger with a key phrase "I'm here, you're okay" by introducing it whilst you have your finger on him and then lift, say, put back, say, lift say, put back say.  Over a few days (not long) you can wean a prop. The verbal reassurance is lessened by saying it less frequently and from further away (also out of the room). For example on SA type things as well as helping my DS with a hand on him or similar I have also judged when enough is enough...when actually he needs to be told to go to sleep.  He is not in danger I am not ignoring him but it is time to go to sleep and you don't need a finger on you because I am still responding to you.  Know what I mean?

The screaming - sorry I am not sure what to suggest.  Does he recover relatively quickly? some can scream every wake up but recover well.  Mine would scream on waking if he had an UT nap because he couldn't transition and was still tired or because he was teething.  Our entire year from 1yo to 2yo was teething - almost permanently. Drove me nuts.

Is it set nap regardless of WU time in the mornings?

I would yes. It's the fastest way to get LO to self regulate the sleep.