what to do while I try to get wake-to-sleep working

[jenben]

Ben is 4 1/2 months and is sleeping pretty well at night.  Naps are a problem.  He's doing the 45 minute wake up.

I know wake-to-sleep is probably the best thing way to help him.  I'm trying hard to do it right, and I'll keep trying.  But I really need to know what to do until I get it right.

Say I don't get it right, and Ben wakes up around 45 minutes.  He is pretty alert, and I have a hard time getting him to go back to sleep.  Sometimes he cries and I do PU/PD, but other times, he quiets when he sees me, or just talks a lot.

He just started turning over a lot, and I know that makes things more challenging.

So, this is my question.  Say he wakes up and is so alert at 45 minutes.  What should I do?
 - try to keep him calm, but keep him in the bed
 - get him up and give up on that nap altogether
 - get him up for a little bit, then put him back down
 - try to get him to go back to sleep
 - something else?

I've been trying to get him to go back to sleep, and it hasn't been going well.  All of the choices seem to mess up keeping an E.A.S.Y. routine, which I'm really trying to make work!

I know wake-to-sleep will help, and I've got a separate post to get help about that.  I really need help knowing what to do until I get that right. 

Maybe there's no good answer, but if anyone can share things that have worked, that'd be great!

[Matthew's Mommy]

Hi there,

If you didn't do wake to sleep, what happens at the 45 min. mark? Does he wake up crying, or does he just wake up alert and happy?

Also, what does his daytime routine look like? length of awake time etc.

Thanks,

[jenben]

Hi, thanks for responding!

If either I do not attempt the wake-to-sleep or it is a "failed" attempt, he starts with a mantra cry gradually building to a genuine cry.  I respond with the PU/PD, shush/pat, or just placing my hands on him, depending on how the situation feels.  He usually calms quickly and will smile and blow raspberries.  At this point, I step out of sight because my presence seems to keep him awake and entertained (even without eye contact from me).  Then, the whole cycle begins again: mantra cry, genuine cry, my response, he quiets, I step away from the crib, he cries...  This can go on for over an hour, basically the rest of the nap by which time it's time to eat.  Now, I'm no longer on the E.A.S.Y. plan because we've had an hour of activity - crying - before eating and he will not be able to stay up as long after eating.  By this point we are both exhausted.

We are gradually building up to a 4 hour eating schedule.  Right now, he eats every 3 hrs 45 mins.  The routine I'm trying to follow is:

Eat: 6:30 until 7am
Activity: 7:00 - 8:30 (2 hrs of awake time, including feeding)
Sleep: 8:30 - 10:15 (1.75 nap)

E: 10:15 - 10:45
A: 10:45 - 12:15
S: 12:15 - 2:00

E: 2:00 - 2:30
A: 2:30 - 4:00
S: 4:00 - 4:45/5:00 (catnap)

E: 4:45 - 5:15 or 5:00 - 5:30
A: until 6:00
6:00/6:15 bath, another feed to top him off, and then to bed.  If his naps were shortened I try to get him to bed by 6:30.  If we've had a good day with decent naps, I'll get him to bed by 7:00.

I have been starting the wind-down routine for the naps early because he takes 15, 20 or sometimes 30 minutes to fall asleep once I set him in his crib.  So, our 2 hour awake time is filled with 30 min feeding and then diaper change, 1 hour other activity, 15-30 minutes wind-down, mostly in the crib.  Our wind-down routine can take as little as 5-10 minutes (usually 5).  I would like to extend it in hopes that he could fall asleep faster, but he tends to become more animated and will rub his face into my chest.  I then go ahead and put him in his crib.

[nathansmum]

Hi... Has there ever been an answer to this post?
would like to know because it might help me in my situation...

thanks!

[brenda2]

hi nathansmom
do you want to post a new post about your situation?  or tell us a bit about your problem and how old your LO is.  sometimes w2s works but often the short naps are due to prop dependency, UT or OT prior to the nap, overstimulation especially with younger bubs in which case w2s probably won't work and in that case it's best to iron out the problem with your routine.  also, some babies are chronic short nappers in which case probably nothing will work until they outgrow at and a lot of babies go through a short nap phase between 4-6 mo or so.  anyway, feel free to post your routine and problem and i can take a look.

how is everyone else doing?

[babybarr]

I'm thinking about doing w2s so have marked to hear what great advice you get - hope that's ok!!

[nathansmum]

Have posted a new topic:

http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=136389.0

[kimothy]

My ds is 6 months old and he used to take 45 mins naps 4x a day. I started going in at the 30 min mark when he would come out of deep sleep and place a hand on him so he wouldn't wake up fully and sometimes I could sush-pat him thru to the next sleep cycle. It seemed to be more effective than waiting til he fully woke after 45 mins.  I'd have to stay there till I knew he was in deep sleep again so it would be about 20 minutes.  Sometimes it was torture to lean over his crib for that long but it helped him get used to sleeping longer naps.  Eventually I would go in and stay that amount of time to make sure he was able to transition without help.  Now I don't have to go in at all so it was worth the effort.